As Muslim women, we often hear about the importance of family, marriage and the husband’s responsibility to provide for his wife and children. And yes, being supported by your husband is perfectly valid. There is nothing wrong with a woman choosing to be a homemaker and relying on her husband financially.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I also believe there is something incredibly valuable about having some money of your own and developing your own ability to earn<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not because we expect our marriages to fail. Not because we don’t trust our husbands. And certainly not because women should be responsible for financially supporting a family when that responsibility belongs elsewhere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s about financial resilience<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Because life can change very quickly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n One thing I’ve become increasingly aware of as I’ve got older is just how unpredictable life can be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You can make plans for your future, but you can’t guarantee that everything will happen exactly as you expect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might be happily married for 20 or 30 years and suddenly find yourself divorced.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might become widowed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Your husband might become seriously ill and no longer be able to work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n He might lose his job and struggle to find another one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might suddenly become responsible for caring for an elderly parent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Your children might need financial help at a time when you weren’t expecting it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n None of these things are particularly pleasant to think about. In fact, some of them can sound quite depressing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But planning for difficult circumstances doesn’t mean you expect them to happen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s simply being prepared.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We do this in other areas of our lives. We have insurance, savings, emergency supplies and backup plans. Financial resilience is another form of preparation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I’ve seen a lot of stories online from women who have been married for decades, raised children and built their entire adult lives around their families, only to find themselves divorced later in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In some cases, their husbands have progressed in their careers while they’ve spent those years caring for the children and managing the home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There is absolutely nothing wrong with that division of roles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But the difficult part comes when the marriage ends and the woman suddenly finds herself with little or no income of her own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n After 20 or 30 years out of the workplace, rebuilding your financial independence can be incredibly difficult.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That’s one reason I think it can be worthwhile for women to maintain some connection with earning \u2014 even if it’s something small.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It could be selling a few things online, doing freelance work, creating content, tutoring, running a small business or developing a skill that could potentially earn money.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It doesn’t have to become a huge business.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The point is to have something that belongs to you<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Another situation we don’t like to think about is losing a husband unexpectedly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A woman may suddenly find herself responsible for herself and her children without the person who previously provided the household income.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Of course, there may be savings, insurance, family support or other resources available. But having your own skills, experience and some financial resources can provide another layer of security.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You can’t predict the future.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And although we hope that our circumstances remain stable for decades, unfortunately, that’s not how life works.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Financial resilience isn’t only about divorce or death.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What happens if your husband becomes seriously ill or has an accident and can no longer work?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps you need to reduce your own working hours to care for him. Perhaps you suddenly become the main person managing the household.<\/p>\n\n\n\n These situations can place enormous emotional and financial pressure on a family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Having some income, savings or an income-generating skill of your own can make an incredibly difficult situation a little easier.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is something I’ve thought about much more as I’ve got older.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Our parents won’t always be as independent as they are now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n As parents age, they may need additional help with housing, equipment, adaptations, transport, carers or other forms of support.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And when you love your parents, it’s difficult to watch them struggle when you know that money could make their situation easier.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Having your own income means you may be able to contribute towards their care or simply help them with things they couldn’t otherwise afford.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It gives you another way of being there for the people who spent so much of their lives looking after you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are also positive reasons for wanting your own income.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps your children eventually want to go to university.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps they need help getting started in adulthood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps they’re getting married and you want to contribute towards the wedding.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps they want to start a business or need help with something unexpected.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Of course, parents aren’t obligated to fund every aspect of their adult children’s lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But if you have the financial means to help your children when they genuinely need it, that can be a wonderful thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Having your own income gives you more options.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is a particularly important reason to have access to your own money.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes a woman may find herself in an unhappy, controlling or unsafe relationship but feel unable to leave because she has no money of her own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Leaving any relationship can be complicated, and financial circumstances can make it even more difficult.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Having some savings or an independent source of income can provide options.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It doesn’t mean that having your own money automatically solves these situations. It doesn’t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But financial resources can be an important part of having choices.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If someone is experiencing domestic abuse or financial abuse, getting appropriate professional and specialist support is important too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Something that isn’t talked about enough is financial abuse<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Financial abuse can involve one person controlling another person’s access to money, preventing them from working, controlling their bank accounts or restricting their ability to make financial decisions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Financial control can become a form of abuse within a relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A healthy relationship should involve trust, communication and respect. While couples may choose to organise their finances in different ways, having no access to money or being completely dependent on someone else’s permission to spend it can leave a person extremely vulnerable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Having some financial knowledge and access to your own money can therefore be an important form of resilience.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Financial independence isn’t only about protecting yourself from difficult circumstances.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It can also give you the freedom to do good.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If your household is financially comfortable and you have money left over, you might choose to:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Being able to give from your own wealth can be incredibly rewarding.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s not always about buying more things for yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes having more money simply means having more opportunities to help other people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is something I really want to emphasise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When I talk about women earning their own money, I’m not<\/strong> saying that every woman needs to get a full-time job.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might be a stay-at-home mum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might have young children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might have caring responsibilities.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might simply not want a conventional career.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That’s completely fine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Financial resilience can look very different from woman to woman.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For one person, it might mean a full-time career.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For another, it might mean a small online business.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For someone else, it might be selling products a few hours a week.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It could be freelancing during school hours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It could be creating digital products.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It could be earning through content creation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It could simply mean developing a skill that you know you could turn into an income if you ever needed to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The amount isn’t necessarily the most important thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s about having options.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n If you’ve never earned money independently before, the idea of starting something can feel overwhelming.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But you don’t have to build a six-figure business.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You could start incredibly small.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps your first goal is \u00a310.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then \u00a350.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then \u00a3100 a month.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might discover that you enjoy it and want to grow it further.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Or perhaps you decide that earning a small amount alongside looking after your family is exactly what works for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There is no single definition of success.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The important thing is that you’re developing your skills, confidence and financial resilience.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I think this distinction is particularly important for Muslim women.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A woman’s desire to earn doesn’t have to mean that she doesn’t appreciate her husband’s role as a provider.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And being financially supported by your husband doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have your own skills, savings or source of income.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Both things can exist at the same time.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n A husband can fulfil his responsibility to provide for his family, while his wife chooses to earn money of her own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Her income doesn’t have to replace his.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It can simply provide another layer of financial resilience for herself and her family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ultimately, none of us knows what tomorrow will bring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You may be married next year. You may still be married 30 years from now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Your husband’s health may remain excellent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Your children may grow up and become financially independent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Your parents may remain healthy for many years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I sincerely hope all of these things happen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But hoping for the best doesn’t mean we shouldn’t prepare for the possibility that life may take an unexpected turn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Having your own money, developing your skills and learning how to earn doesn’t mean you’re expecting something bad to happen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It means you’re giving yourself options<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And for me, that’s what financial independence is really about.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not replacing the support of your family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not trying to do everything alone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But having the ability to say:<\/p>\n\n\n\n “If life changes, I have something of my own that I can fall back on.”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n And as women, and particularly as mothers, I think that’s worth building.<\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"You Don’t Know What Tomorrow Will Bring<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
What If Your Marriage Ends?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
What If You Become Widowed?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
What If Your Husband Becomes Ill?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Supporting Elderly Parents<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Helping Your Children<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Financial Independence Can Help You Leave an Unsafe Situation<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Financial Abuse Is Real<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Your Money Can Also Give You the Ability to Give<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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You Don’t Have to Earn a Full-Time Income<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Start Small<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Your Husband Can Provide AND You Can Earn<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
You Can’t Predict the Future \u2014 But You Can Prepare for It<\/h2>\n\n\n\n